Tag Archives: sexual violence

Survivors and Eating Disorders

Sorry for the delay- because I could not get permission to repost this article, I have to simply link you to the original.

http://www.aftersilence.org/eating-disorders.php

It is an excellent post on the relationship between sexual abuse survivors and eating disorders.

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One other short post, from a friend who survived a long battle with anorexia, on the topic of “pro-anorexia” tips:

I really, really oppose eating disorder tips since I don’t want anyone to ever have to experience the hell I have, but after reading this list of “tips” I felt compelled to share.

1) Turn off all the heat in your house and open the windows wide. Walk around in short sleeves and dip your fingers and toes in bowls of ice water every 10-15 minutes. This will do nothing to help you lose weight but it will help train you for the misery that anorexia brings in the form of being constantly cold. You are not allowed reprieve from this “feel the cold” stage as you will never be warm again until you recover.

2) Visit your hairdresser and ask her to pluck 25-50% of the hair from your head. While you’re at it ask her to overprocess your hair with whatever chemicals she had on hand. If the overprocessing makes you lose even more hair that’s even better. This step will get you used to the dry, brittle, falling out hair you’ll have once you’re nutrient deprived.

3) If you plan on purging you should visit your dentist and ask them to grind all the enamel off your teeth. While there also ask if they can pull out a couple of existing fillings. Your teeth will be wrecked soon anyway so you may as well get a head start and learn what it feels like to have super sensitive teeth once your enamel is gone.

4) Ignore all your friends. Don’t tell them why. Don’t do anything that would give them a chance to try and stop you from cutting them out. You will likely feel utterly miserable. Learn to expect that. You will feel miserable during every day of your eating disorder anyway. The loneliness is a key part of this misery.

5) If you’re in school you should throw away all your textbooks and order their equivalents in a foreign language. This stage will get you started on the cognitive difficulties you will suffer once malnutrition sets in. In a few months of anorexia you will feel like everything is in a foreign language anyway since you can’t read it because your malnourished brain has made you stupid.

6) If you have a job ask your boss to start withholding half your pay. With the amount of sick days you have once your ED is bad you’re going to lose half your pay anyway. This will help you get used to that. In 3 months you should quit your job with no backup plan. This will let you know what it feels like to be fired because your ED made you a lousy employee.

7) Throw away your calendar. Stop asking people their name. Leave your backpack and purse at home every time you go out. You need to learn what it’s like to live without a memory. As well as making you stupid malnutrition will rob you of your memory. Stand up every ten minutes to make sure you turned off the kettle/iron/tap. You know you are forgetful and you are anxious about that. Do this all day every day. You will soon forget why anyway as your memory becomes utterly useless.

8) Throw away all your moisturizer, body wash, anything that makes your skin soft and lovely. Like your hair you need to feel what it’s like for that to be dry and fragile. Think back to the last time you fell down a flight of stairs. With your malnourished body and skin you will feel like that every single day. You will wake up bruised and aching and scraped and you won’t know why. The answer is your ED. The answer to all misery is your ED.

9) Lock yourself in a dark room. Put up spotlights everywhere else in the house. Do not shower. Do not even wash your face. Play music that makes you sad. When it’s time for bed play a c.d. of a jackhammer. The e.d. will rob your ability to sleep well and you need to experience that. If all of this sounds like torture…it is. With this ED you will be sad, scared, and panicked all the time. This emotional hell will rob you of the ability to do tasks as simple as brushing your teeth.

10) Write a list of every good thing you want out of life. Burn it. As long as you have an eating disorder that is all you will have. You will watch every good thing go up in smoke.

If you’ve read this list and still want tips on how to lose weight then I beg you to seek help immediately. This list might be tongue in cheek; not every thing on this list will happen to every eating disorder sufferer, but for every bad item listed there are 101 others not listed.


Women’s “m.powerment”

I do a lot of things with my time- one of those things is work for a company that has an initiative to help end domestic violence and partner violence through educational programs and grants. (I keep a link on the right hand side of this blog that will bring you to that site.)
Wednesday night I was briefly featured on News 12 NJ for my work with mark and the m.powerment campaign. Here is a (poor quality) video of that news story:

If you would like to take part in the m.powerment campaign I want you to know- 100% of the proceeds from sales go to the campaign and NOT me. I do not make money off of m.powerment campaign, I promote it because I believe in it’s message.


What Your Ad is Really Saying

And the victim blaming continues. I understand that the central message behind this campaign is ending dangerous drinking behaviors- but this group is going about this message very, very incorrectly. This article is reposted from ‘Feministing’.

PA Liquor Control Board to teens: Rape is your fault, and your friends’ fault!

The Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board recently released a new ad campaign, Control Tonight, that attempts to curb teen drinking. Their case? Don’t drink too much, or else you’ll get raped, but hey–that’s your fault, because we warned you!

One ad features a young girl’s legs, underwear around the ankles, as she lays on what appears to be a bathroom floor. The text reads, “She didn’t want to do it, but she couldn’t say no.”

The campaign even blames the victim’s friends–the Control Tonight website reads:

“Calling the shots starts with you. What if you didn’t watch out for your friends during a night of drinking?”

The campaign blatantly shifts the blame onto victims and friends, and away from the very person who deserves it: the rapist.

While the board may have had good intentions, these ads show that rape culture is alive and well in our society. Alcohol is definitely a huge factor when it comes to sexual assault, but in no circumstances is it ever the victim’s fault. Again we see our culture continuing to teach “Don’t get raped!” instead of “Don’t rape.” And instead of teaching people how to make sure they’re properly getting consent from someone they’re hooking up with, our society perpetuates a mindset that makes women feel guilty for a crime committed against them.

Call or email the PA Liquor Control Board and ask them to pull the campaign: 1-800-453-PLCB (1-800-453-7522), or contact@controltonight.com

The ad:

 

Source: http://feministing.com/2011/12/07/pa-liquor-control-board-to-teens-rape-is-your-fault-and-your-friends-fault/?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter


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